The Library

A true gentlemen’s club is one where all the worries of the world are left at the door – a place where the only thing a man needs to worry about is when he ultimately must leave.

The Library is an old hoity-toity gentlemen’s club that has never seen, even once in its 80-year-run, a time when its services weren’t needed. (However, neither has it seen overabundant need.) Rather than a lowly strip club like The Cat’s Meow, The Library prides itself in its self-proclaimed class, which draws “respectable” and “wealthy” men to its door.

The Library’s main function is as a place of socialization and relaxation for men – not just any man, but business men or men who need a place to escape to for a drink, “intellectual” discussions with fellows, or a round of pool without concerning themselves with the need to censor themselves or dealing with any unsavory interactions. (In the most common case, this means the nagging wife or girlfriend.) The culture in the Library is quite white collar, misogynistic and generally offensive to all other demographics that aren’t cismale (most typically white cismale) of generally Christian, conservative, Republican values. While to any other person this atmosphere is toxic, disheartening and/or infuriating, the Library patrons greatly cherish it and quickly weed out (without any input from staff or management) anyone who does not fit their demographic.

Services:

  • Billiards, dart boards, shuffleboard for rent
  • Electronic slot machines, Blackjack table, and Poker table
  • Attractive, young, polite, congenial, and (most importantly) scantily clad hostesses
  • Full-service bar
  • Appetizers and snacks
  • Numerous TVs (most commonly set on sports)
  • Bi-nightly strip-tease shows
  • Relaxation lounges

All patrons may enjoy the above without a membership, but those who pay a monthly fee to be Silver Members, or the (hefty) yearly fee for the honor of Gold Membership enjoy additional privileges.

Silver Membership includes:

  • Invitation to members-only events
  • Discounts on food costs and games rental fees (excluding gambling)
  • Access to the members-only lounge
  • One complimentary drink a night

Gold Membership includes:

  • Invitation to members-only events
  • Free food and games (excluding gambling)
  • Access to the members-only lounge
  • Access to the VIP lounge
  • One complimentary drink for the member and his guests
  • One hostess of your choice at the member’s beck and call

Members may bring up to three guests into the members-only lounge and only one guest into the VIP lounge. The member’s lounge is a space for more elite patrons, and offers the same as the rest of the club with the added bonus of more hostesses per patron. (This often leads to personal, sexual, but not sexually-explicit favors in the exchange for ‘tips’.) The VIP lounge is much the same, but one can only imagine what transpires in an exclusive room with powerful men and their hostess-attendants…

Smoking is allowed inside.

The Library’s hostesses are encouraged to be demure and avoid conflict with the patrons; these poor ladies suffer through plenty of sexual harassment.

The business is obligated by law to not discriminate against other genders, but because of their regular clientele, the male-oriented services they offer, and the general distaste and disregard for any non-male patrons on premise, any non-male patrons are very rarely seen in the Library.

Description:
Contrary to the name, The Library isn’t remotely like a library. (The name serves well for deception. “Honey, I’m going to the library,” sounds pretty innocuous and isn’t a lie!) Its decor draws from the desirable mood of a turn-of-the-(19th) Century men’s parlor and the edginess of contrast, black, and sharp lines. Much of the furniture is plush leather, dark wood, and metal, often in dark reds, dark purples, and black.

The Library is situated on the first and second floor of a row of store-and-apartment buildings. The front entrance opens into a small receiving space, where patrons are greeted and must be screened by a hostess. Once they’re free to do, two doors perpendicular to the entrance lead into the main area, where the gaming tables, bar, and general seating is. Rather than restaurant-style booths and tables, the seating is plush and comfortable, with ample side tables or coffee tables on which to set food and drinks.

In the back of the room is access to the stage area (which serves as an additional, more private lounge when shows aren’t going on), and a stairwell upstairs. A bouncer (one of very few male staff members) guards the door and makes sure that only patrons with Silver or Gold membership cards are allowed on the second level.

Location:
44 Jefferson

Hours: (excluding special events)
Monday-Wednesday | 3pm to 1am
Thursday | 3pm to 2am
Friday & Saturday | 12pm to 3am
Sunday | 12pm to 1am

The Library

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